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Sunday, February 24, 2008

Last night, I started to worry about rattlesnakes. This is not a good thing. The average house has so many entry points for those slithery intruders – and ours is no exception!

Truth be told, every time we open the garage door, a rattlesnake could be beetling in, fast as his little scaly underbelly could crawl across the concrete floor!

Every time I open the front door to pick up my morning paper, a rattlesnake could be tiptoeing in from the side, with me completely unawares....

But not anymore! I’ll be looking now, rattlesnakes – so be on your best behaviour! I will not tolerate a single rattler inside this home!!

Man, the more I think about it, a rattlesnake would have endless possibilities for hiding places in here. Under sofas, in the heating vents, under Mrs. That Dan Guy’s extensive and comprehensively large shoe collection…

A rattlesnake could easily crawl up our stairs, and hide under our bed, or in our closets. He could hide among the many wires that inhabit our audio/visual centre…

Why, a crafty rattlesnake could even patiently await in our bathtub, as we keep the shower curtains drawn. Imagine that – opening a shower curtain, and having a bloodthirsty rattlesnake uncoil, in a savage lunge of poisonous death!! From a freakin’ bathtub!!

I’m starting to get the willies, just thinking a bit more about this…

I wonder how much a mongoose costs???

Chow for now!!

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thank you darlin for ensuring a "no sleep" night for me tonight!

- MTDG

ThatDanGuy said...

Does this mean we can get a mongoose??

Anonymous said...

Uh NO!

-MTDG

ThatDanGuy said...

MONGOOSE MONGOOSE MONGOOSE!!!!

Anonymous said...

You know what? I have been far too hasty in my reaction. Go ahead, buy a mongoose honey. Fill your boots with mongooses! Mongooses up the ying yang! Mongoose away!
And, good luck with that!

-MTDG

ThatDanGuy said...

If I could, I'd like to raise one from a pup - for exceptional loyalty.

Not sure how I'd train it to eat snakes though...