I am looking at the most beautiful thing I have seen in a long, long time. I am embarrassed to admit that I'm even drooling just a little bit. OK, a lot...

This is going to be the first loaf of white bread in my house since 2005. Yessir, for the entire current year to date I've eaten rye bread, rye bread, and more rye bread. My wife prefers cardboard or replacement inner soles to white bread, but she's not here today to roll her eyes at my good fortune...she's away. Hee Hee Hee....

I'll have to eat really, really fast...

Hey, you can't put all the blame on me!! I was raised on white bread, along with the rest of what was an entirely bland diet. For our family, seasoning was something the Colonel added to his takeout chicken, or at the very most the two shakers of salt and pepper in our kitchen. A real exotic dish in my childhood was a Sloppy Joe.

So, the only question now is how best to enjoy this fresh and delicate forbidden pleasure. Dare I toast it? The loaf is as tender as those rolls of toilet paper Mr. Wiffle used to advertise back in the seventies, kind of a melt-in-your-mouth, maybe even in your hands delight.

No, toasting would be sacrilegious. This baby is meant to be consumed naturally, like the day it was born, fresh from the oven.

Pardon me, I must prepare the peanut butter and jam...this may not be pretty...

Chow for now!!