2000 Posts!!
Well, today is officially my 2000th post - not sure if that’s astounding to anyone else but me, but astounding nonetheless.
And, as it happens, I am actually posting this courtesy of my own Personal Hotspot - essentially sharing the internet from my i-Phone. It is a milestone achieved by Apple - it is just sooo fitting!!
So, reflections. Or self-indulgence, you can be the judge...
I started doing this blog back in 2006 to replace something called “Morning Papers”, a daily writer’s exercise involving writing out three long-hand pages, from the top of your head. I did that exercise faithfully for years, even while camping in the pouring rain, or away on holidays. Ironically, shortly after I started doing this blog, I was on a trip to Dayton for the bi-annual Erma Bombeck Writers’ Workshop - and posted of seeing not only the sites of that city, but column-writing icons like Dave Barry. If you scroll back through the archives, you can see me grinning like an idiot beside him.
That ended up becoming a regular part of the blog over the years. Travel writing, reviews of events I was attending - which has expanded my writing away from the regular humour column I had been writing at the time. Still do some of that, but thanks to this space in particular, I now do book and CD reviews, concert and other reviews - totally expanded my writing horizon, due to a silly bit of daily posted drivel.
And there has been drivel, let me tell you. Many days I sit here, and wonder just what the hell I’m supposed to be writing about. I’ve fractured many a popular fairy tale, or rambled on about absolutely nothing many, many times here.
I’ve also posted links to my other writing, and allowed a certain chain-smoking, hard-drinking delusional chicken to guest post on weekends, which inexplicably is my most viewed feature here - often by over double the next closest topic. Just goes to show you can’t pre-judge what attracts readers.
Anyhow, it’s been a wild ride, to say the least. Now you can view my audio interview series, catch up on my Tweets, and find valuable savings on penis enlargement products (or restaurant coupons, it varies...) - all from this convenient space.
Now, I just have to rebuild my main website!
Thanks, crazy readers - it’s your fault I do this every day. Here’s to the next 2000!
Chow for now!!
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Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Monday, July 18, 2011
Today I’m gonna blog like it’s 1999.
Because today IS my 1999th blog - posted consecutively since 2006 (aside from one day, due to extenuating circumstances).
Man, how things have changed in this space over the years. From amusing myself (in print - hey, this is still considered a family space, Charlie aside...), slowly converting over from Windows OS to Mac (YAHOO!!!!!), and gaining follower #9 recently, it feels like it’s just been a blink of an eye.
I’ll blather on much more tomorrow, but for today, I just want to bask in the reflected glory of Regis & Kelly - which is on TV right now, and frankly has absolutely nothing to do with this blog space. I can see my reflection in a corner of the TV screen...
Yessir, 2000 blog posts - if the U.S. Congress wasn’t so busy with some silly debit ceiling, maybe I’d be getting a nice engraved note from the Oval Office.
For staying the hell in Canada....
Chow for now!!
Because today IS my 1999th blog - posted consecutively since 2006 (aside from one day, due to extenuating circumstances).
Man, how things have changed in this space over the years. From amusing myself (in print - hey, this is still considered a family space, Charlie aside...), slowly converting over from Windows OS to Mac (YAHOO!!!!!), and gaining follower #9 recently, it feels like it’s just been a blink of an eye.
I’ll blather on much more tomorrow, but for today, I just want to bask in the reflected glory of Regis & Kelly - which is on TV right now, and frankly has absolutely nothing to do with this blog space. I can see my reflection in a corner of the TV screen...
Yessir, 2000 blog posts - if the U.S. Congress wasn’t so busy with some silly debit ceiling, maybe I’d be getting a nice engraved note from the Oval Office.
For staying the hell in Canada....
Chow for now!!
Sunday, July 17, 2011
What do W. Bruce Cameron, Dave Barry, Garrison Keillor, Will Ferguson, Chuckle Bros., The National Society Of Newspaper Columnists, and The Erma Bombeck Writers’ Workshop have in common?
Well, obviously for the most part, humour (or in America, humor). They are also all part of my piece on “Adding Some Funny To YOUR Writing” that just came out in the newest issue of WestWord Magazine, the official publication for members of The Writers’ Guild Of Alberta. I wish it were available online, to share copies with everyone - they did a terrific job!!
Compiling tidbits from either seeing many of these successful humorists at events with the latter two organizations, or from interviewing the writers or cartoonists themselves, I put together a few tools to..well, do what the title of the piece suggests!
There’s probably copyright concerns and other legal implications, but if you’d like a copy, fire me off a note, and I’l see what I can do.
Just be prepared to arrange bail if things go sideways...
Chow for now!!
PS - Scroll back up to that photo montage, and click on it! Many of my interviews are there in the archives - FREE DOWNLOADS!!
Well, obviously for the most part, humour (or in America, humor). They are also all part of my piece on “Adding Some Funny To YOUR Writing” that just came out in the newest issue of WestWord Magazine, the official publication for members of The Writers’ Guild Of Alberta. I wish it were available online, to share copies with everyone - they did a terrific job!!
Compiling tidbits from either seeing many of these successful humorists at events with the latter two organizations, or from interviewing the writers or cartoonists themselves, I put together a few tools to..well, do what the title of the piece suggests!
There’s probably copyright concerns and other legal implications, but if you’d like a copy, fire me off a note, and I’l see what I can do.
Just be prepared to arrange bail if things go sideways...
Chow for now!!
PS - Scroll back up to that photo montage, and click on it! Many of my interviews are there in the archives - FREE DOWNLOADS!!
Saturday, July 16, 2011
Chicken Scratch
(posted by weekend guest blogger, Charlie the unsettled Chicken...)
LOOKEE HERE, MAMMALS!!
Ole Charlie is tryin’ out sumthin’ new - how does I look, as a peacock??
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Frankly, it ain’t a walk in tha park bein’ a chicken, friends. Always sleepin’ with one eye open, lookin’ out fer them nasty foxes an coyotes.
Then, I keep gittin’ carded at tha bar, like tha bouncers can’t tell I’m uv legal age.
It gets old, lemme tell ya - OLD!!!!
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
So, I figures I gotta step ma life up a notch er two. My plans to try bein’ an eegle din go over so swell - turns out ma beek ain’t so bendy after all...
But - with a lil additional (an grander) pinfeathers - holy pluck!! Lookit me now, Ma!!
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Can’t wait ta strut aroun tha bar tonite!! Tha chicks is gonna dig this, shur nuff!!
Jus gotta watch when I hafta use tha lil chicken’s room - these damn plummages is pluckin’ heavy!!
Charlie out, hoomans!!
Cluck fer now...
Friday, July 15, 2011
(Post # 1996!!)
And so it begins....
Despite enjoying a particularly healthy Peter Pan complex, I fear that I am slowly succumbing to adulthood.
For example, the other day my parents called, long distance from Winnipeg. As we were chatting, I began to wander around, and putter - picking up newspapers, straightening the vitamin containers (labels facing forward)...and then I noticed that the phone base was empty, so I began to hunt around for the phone.
As I was agreeing with my mother about some sort of comment on weather or nuclear disarmament, I was getting really baffled, wondering just what the hell I had done with my phone!
Well, the conversation ended, I hung up, and placed the phone on the coffee table.
It was at that moment that the light went on. Literally. When you end the call, a little light displays on the phone. That was also when I realized I maybe should have been looking for scattered marbles, and not the phone...
Chow for now!!
And so it begins....
Despite enjoying a particularly healthy Peter Pan complex, I fear that I am slowly succumbing to adulthood.
For example, the other day my parents called, long distance from Winnipeg. As we were chatting, I began to wander around, and putter - picking up newspapers, straightening the vitamin containers (labels facing forward)...and then I noticed that the phone base was empty, so I began to hunt around for the phone.
As I was agreeing with my mother about some sort of comment on weather or nuclear disarmament, I was getting really baffled, wondering just what the hell I had done with my phone!
Well, the conversation ended, I hung up, and placed the phone on the coffee table.
It was at that moment that the light went on. Literally. When you end the call, a little light displays on the phone. That was also when I realized I maybe should have been looking for scattered marbles, and not the phone...
Chow for now!!
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Quit Moving The Goal Post!! (For Pete’s Sake...)
As proud as I am at my efforts this year so far with social media et al, I find myself continually BEHIND the eight ball. Which, if the eight ball was a big-screen TV, featuring a La-Z-Boy recliner, a bottomless bowl of popcorn, and a handy beer fridge, wouldn’t be all that bad, after all.
However, my eight ball is the ever-moving, ever-growing, ever-never-will-I-catch-it goalpost of newer and better social media options.
I barely eked my LinkedIn numbers above 100 connections, when FaceBook launched their own version, Branchout. Now I need to frantically ensure that for every kindly soul that has reached out to connect with me so far, I return said connection. One does not want to appear stand-offish in their online networks. One also does not want to appear like that balding uncle with the aviator frame glasses, who drops in unannounced to borrow your Sears catalogue - innocent as that might appear...
I’m starting to worry that Twitter will soon be replaced as well, but something like “Ter”, where you are only allowed 14 characters to be witty and memorable in attracting followers. Good luck with that, speech writers and tiny url creators!!
Better shake a leg - this blog will soon be obsolete, replaced by an i-Pad finger-painting program with hieroglyphics for posts, which will mean continuing education courses for interpretation.
Sheesh - at my age, I should just be having to worry about where I’ve left my dentures...and hoping I haven’t plopped them in my cereal bowl (again...)!!
Chow for now!!
As proud as I am at my efforts this year so far with social media et al, I find myself continually BEHIND the eight ball. Which, if the eight ball was a big-screen TV, featuring a La-Z-Boy recliner, a bottomless bowl of popcorn, and a handy beer fridge, wouldn’t be all that bad, after all.
However, my eight ball is the ever-moving, ever-growing, ever-never-will-I-catch-it goalpost of newer and better social media options.
I barely eked my LinkedIn numbers above 100 connections, when FaceBook launched their own version, Branchout. Now I need to frantically ensure that for every kindly soul that has reached out to connect with me so far, I return said connection. One does not want to appear stand-offish in their online networks. One also does not want to appear like that balding uncle with the aviator frame glasses, who drops in unannounced to borrow your Sears catalogue - innocent as that might appear...
I’m starting to worry that Twitter will soon be replaced as well, but something like “Ter”, where you are only allowed 14 characters to be witty and memorable in attracting followers. Good luck with that, speech writers and tiny url creators!!
Better shake a leg - this blog will soon be obsolete, replaced by an i-Pad finger-painting program with hieroglyphics for posts, which will mean continuing education courses for interpretation.
Sheesh - at my age, I should just be having to worry about where I’ve left my dentures...and hoping I haven’t plopped them in my cereal bowl (again...)!!
Chow for now!!
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Hoo-Haa!!
No reason for that outburst, it just always feel great to do a little impromptu “Hoo-Haa”!!
From experience, I can assure you that “Oh-Oh” never has the same uplifting reaction. That exclamation usually means I’ve got some hasty repairs or cleanup to do before Mrs. That Dan Guy enters the room.
Also, “Who der??” is a phrase I don’t like using, either with respect to bumps and bangs in supposedly unoccupied areas of house and home, or after the doorbell rings on a sunny Saturday afternoon. I have been humbled both by crafty, resourceful raccoons, and crafty resourceful Girl Guide cookie sellers.
No, “Hoo-Haa”, I say, and let’s just leave it at that...
Chow for now...
No reason for that outburst, it just always feel great to do a little impromptu “Hoo-Haa”!!
From experience, I can assure you that “Oh-Oh” never has the same uplifting reaction. That exclamation usually means I’ve got some hasty repairs or cleanup to do before Mrs. That Dan Guy enters the room.
Also, “Who der??” is a phrase I don’t like using, either with respect to bumps and bangs in supposedly unoccupied areas of house and home, or after the doorbell rings on a sunny Saturday afternoon. I have been humbled both by crafty, resourceful raccoons, and crafty resourceful Girl Guide cookie sellers.
No, “Hoo-Haa”, I say, and let’s just leave it at that...
Chow for now...
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Odd Body Parts
I don’t even know what a “lumbar” is, but it strikes me as a funny name for body part. Did a lumberjack come up with that? “Uh, how about “lumber”? No??”
Then there’s “clavicle”. It sounds like a musical instrument: “Did you attend Timmy’s clavicle recital last night? Oh, he was just divine!!”
I could do this all day! What about “femur”? It’’s not just an exotic animal, it’s somewhere on your body! “Doc, I think I’ve got a swollen femur...”
Who knows - maybe after all the vital organs were named, the biologists in charge of naming body parts went loopy with Peach Schnapps shooters.
And fell on their collective sacroiliacs....
Chow for now!
I don’t even know what a “lumbar” is, but it strikes me as a funny name for body part. Did a lumberjack come up with that? “Uh, how about “lumber”? No??”
Then there’s “clavicle”. It sounds like a musical instrument: “Did you attend Timmy’s clavicle recital last night? Oh, he was just divine!!”
I could do this all day! What about “femur”? It’’s not just an exotic animal, it’s somewhere on your body! “Doc, I think I’ve got a swollen femur...”
Who knows - maybe after all the vital organs were named, the biologists in charge of naming body parts went loopy with Peach Schnapps shooters.
And fell on their collective sacroiliacs....
Chow for now!
Monday, July 11, 2011
Google Analytics
As I steadily plod on to my 2000th post (consecutive posts, day after numbing day), I am enjoying some crazy trends, at least according to the stats Google enables users to access.
The other day for example, my Page Views were ranked as follows”
1) U.S. (thank you, America. I envy your carved mountains - I can’t see us ever doing that for our Prime Ministers...)
2) France (France?? Really?? They know I’m not Jerry Lewis, right?)
3) Canada (Well, at least a few of my fellow Canadians are visiting. Probably most are in vacation in the U.S. and France...)
I think the increase of readership in France might be due to the link I posted here a few days ago, to my national column - which was bemoaning my utter lack of success in learning how to speak....French. I imagine a cosmopolitan Frenchman on his lunch break, sipping red wine and eating cheese bread, accidentally stumbling upon that column while surfing The Google for updates on Will & Kate’s visit to North America.
Arousing his curiosity, he read it, and bemused, alerted his friend Jacques: “Jacques, thees Canadien ees struggling to lurn our lan-goo-age. You must see how large an ee-dee-ot he ees”.
Jacques reads my column, and forwards it on to his sister Cosette, who speaks better English than Jacques and his friend Pierre. She passes it on to her girlfriend Eponine...
And on and on it has gone, propelling my blog to a sensation (of sorts) in France.
Tomorrow, I expand my borders with my latest post, “How I Failed Miserably Learning To Speak Spanish...Oy Vey!!”
Chow for now...
As I steadily plod on to my 2000th post (consecutive posts, day after numbing day), I am enjoying some crazy trends, at least according to the stats Google enables users to access.
The other day for example, my Page Views were ranked as follows”
1) U.S. (thank you, America. I envy your carved mountains - I can’t see us ever doing that for our Prime Ministers...)
2) France (France?? Really?? They know I’m not Jerry Lewis, right?)
3) Canada (Well, at least a few of my fellow Canadians are visiting. Probably most are in vacation in the U.S. and France...)
I think the increase of readership in France might be due to the link I posted here a few days ago, to my national column - which was bemoaning my utter lack of success in learning how to speak....French. I imagine a cosmopolitan Frenchman on his lunch break, sipping red wine and eating cheese bread, accidentally stumbling upon that column while surfing The Google for updates on Will & Kate’s visit to North America.
Arousing his curiosity, he read it, and bemused, alerted his friend Jacques: “Jacques, thees Canadien ees struggling to lurn our lan-goo-age. You must see how large an ee-dee-ot he ees”.
Jacques reads my column, and forwards it on to his sister Cosette, who speaks better English than Jacques and his friend Pierre. She passes it on to her girlfriend Eponine...
And on and on it has gone, propelling my blog to a sensation (of sorts) in France.
Tomorrow, I expand my borders with my latest post, “How I Failed Miserably Learning To Speak Spanish...Oy Vey!!”
Chow for now...
Sunday, July 10, 2011
(Post # 1990...)
Chow for now!!
AFI Tribute – Morgan Freeman 2011
You know, if you would have asked me earlier this year who my favourite actor might have been, I would likely have suggested the talented Tom Hanks, or even Jack Nicholson – maybe even Anthony Hopkins? Based on the variety of movies that Mrs. That Dan Guy and I watch, there are many actors that fall under the watch of our celluloid radar, be they in action, comedy or drama pieces.
I wouldn’t have expected our hands-down favourite to be Mr. Morgan Freeman, but the evidence is pretty compelling, having recently watched his American Film Institute tribute…
When the show started to reveal the multitude of roles he’s been featured in, we kept going, “OMG (we really do say OMG around the house…), we’ve seen that movie!” “OMG, we’ve seen that movie too!”
Turns out if there is one actor above all others that keeps us riveted to a screen, it really is Mr. Freeman. From “Bucket List”, to “Million Dollar Baby”, the terrific “Red”, and even on to the little known gems like “10 Items Or Less”, he absolutely grabs the viewers with his screen presence.
I’m almost embarrassed to say that I own his breakout role in “Street Smart”. On Betamax…
I could ramble on all day, but of all the clips the AFI previewed, we had seen every single one. There’s no other actor living or dead with that sort of body of work, that we’ve seen at least. Maybe Jean-Claude Van Damme, but he doesn't do a lot of romantic comedy...
As it happens, back in 2009 we attended the Mandela Day event in NYC, and he was among a galaxy of stars that paid tribute to the iconic leader. That’s where those pics above are from.
Howdy, Mr. Favourite Actor – keep on making those enjoyable films of yours…
Saturday, July 09, 2011
Chicken Scratch
(posted by weekend guest blogger, Cowpoke Chuck...)
YEE-HAW, boys n gurls! Ole Charlie is back fer anuther Calgary Stampede, even if it is now officially Royalty-free. Unless ya count tha King uv tha Coop!!
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Yessiree lil doggies, I gots ma stampede boots on, an I dusted off ma spurs (Ching Ching Ching...). I may rope me a steer, or at least a corn dog. All bets r off fer this annual selly-brashun a life on tha farm - right up my alley...or barnyard, mebbe...
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
YEE-HAW!!!!!!
Sorry, hard ta resist - ma inner cowpoke is strugglin’ ta control hisself...
I’ll probably take in a mainstage event tonite. Chuckwagons, I guess. Enuff corn dogs nd I could be upchuckin’ at tha Chucks - how bout them bananas???
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Git along, lil doggie - seriously, move on, ya hairy chihuahua!! This corn dog is all mine...
Aw nuts - I gotta go get ma lasso outta that garage - can’t hardly rope no steers without ma lariat.
Well, I’m out, tenderfoots. This bird’s gonna take care a bizniz - monkey bizniz!!
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Cluck fer now!!
Friday, July 08, 2011
WIll & Kate, Will & Kate...now I know how Marcia Marcia Marcia felt on The Brady Bunch.
With the whole world watching Canada, thanks to the newest royal couple here in Calgary right now visiting, I feel that the entire world (or at least the four people I rely on) has stopped watching me.
For example, Will & Kate are English. We have two official languages here in Canada, and I just happened to write a column about the second one.
You can take a break from all the royalty hoopla by clicking on this link:
http://www.remonline.com/home/?p=9199
Sure, you can continue to be hypnotized by the charm and poise of an attractive young couple, or you can enjoy a few laughs, and support both of our official languages.
A no-brainer, as far as I’m concerned.
Hey, the Stampede Parade is starting. There’s Will & Kate!!
Gotta go..........
Chow for now.
With the whole world watching Canada, thanks to the newest royal couple here in Calgary right now visiting, I feel that the entire world (or at least the four people I rely on) has stopped watching me.
For example, Will & Kate are English. We have two official languages here in Canada, and I just happened to write a column about the second one.
You can take a break from all the royalty hoopla by clicking on this link:
http://www.remonline.com/home/?p=9199
Sure, you can continue to be hypnotized by the charm and poise of an attractive young couple, or you can enjoy a few laughs, and support both of our official languages.
A no-brainer, as far as I’m concerned.
Hey, the Stampede Parade is starting. There’s Will & Kate!!
Gotta go..........
Chow for now.
Thursday, July 07, 2011
Stage West Calgary
“Don’t Hug Me”
Directed by Bob Walton
An interview with actor, director and writer Bob Walton
How does someone so soft-spoken draw you so deeply into a conversation? Well, it could be when he shares his wide-ranging theatre experience, or drops in a little tidbit about Tony award-winning actress Faith Prince. If you have seen or plan to see Stage West Calgary’s current production of the musical comedy “Don’t Hug Me”, you’ll enjoy this interview with director Bob Walton – and it’s free! How can you go wrong??
Just scroll back up and click on the photo montage above, or go to i-Tunes, and subscribe for free (thatdanguy’s podcast).
Wednesday, July 06, 2011
Well, better late than never I suppose. Finally managed to load the interview with Bob Walton, which will now be my lead post tomorrow - so apologies in advance for the double dose.
Scroll back up to the photo montage above, and download (it's free!!) the audio interview with Bob, or roll on over to i-Tunes, and subscribe to me on "thatdanguy's podcast"...
Chow for now!
Scroll back up to the photo montage above, and download (it's free!!) the audio interview with Bob, or roll on over to i-Tunes, and subscribe to me on "thatdanguy's podcast"...
Chow for now!
COME BACK LATER TODAY!!!
Looks like I’ll have two posts today (not that this is going to qualify as much of a post...), seeing as how I am so close to posting my interview with actor, director and writer Bob Walton - I just need to record an intro, an outro, and post it.
So, please check back later - I may even just remove this silly bit, and replace it with the actual interview - who knows?? There are clearly no rules in this space!!!
Chow for now...
Looks like I’ll have two posts today (not that this is going to qualify as much of a post...), seeing as how I am so close to posting my interview with actor, director and writer Bob Walton - I just need to record an intro, an outro, and post it.
So, please check back later - I may even just remove this silly bit, and replace it with the actual interview - who knows?? There are clearly no rules in this space!!!
Chow for now...
Tuesday, July 05, 2011
(Post # 1985!!)
I was born in the wrong country...
Just watching one of the many 4th of July celebrations on TV (from The Capitol, with host Jimmy Smits). Man, they do it up right. Not that Canada Day here isn’t well done, but there is just something in American patriotic celebrations that sweeps you up.
Of course, I could just be suffering from Vegas Withdrawal Syndrome, and need to get me down for a quick fix....
Hey, I hope to have my audio interview posted tomorrow (finally). Seems to be taking forever this time, but it will be worth the wait. Director, actor and writer Bob Walton offers loads of insight, over the course of our chat.
Well, back to the 4th celebrations - Josh Groban is on now....
Chow for now!
I was born in the wrong country...
Just watching one of the many 4th of July celebrations on TV (from The Capitol, with host Jimmy Smits). Man, they do it up right. Not that Canada Day here isn’t well done, but there is just something in American patriotic celebrations that sweeps you up.
Of course, I could just be suffering from Vegas Withdrawal Syndrome, and need to get me down for a quick fix....
Hey, I hope to have my audio interview posted tomorrow (finally). Seems to be taking forever this time, but it will be worth the wait. Director, actor and writer Bob Walton offers loads of insight, over the course of our chat.
Well, back to the 4th celebrations - Josh Groban is on now....
Chow for now!
Monday, July 04, 2011
My First Fourth of July (in The U.S.A.)
(NOTE: This is the original, unedited version of a previous newspaper humour column..)
After decades of celebrating Canada Day here at home, my wife and I had a chance to experience our first-ever Fourth of July celebrations on U.S. Boston
However, this story has two parts, beginning on the 3rd of July.
That morning, we were getting an early start to our day, having breakfast in our hotel - The Omni Parker House. The restaurant in this hotel has seen a fair share of history itself. It happens to be where John F. Kennedy proposed to Jackie. It also boasts Malcolm X as a former busboy. I understand a couple of recent American Idol contestants are going to be future waiters there...
After breakfast, we had time to fill, so we rushed off to Prudential Center
Zipping back to our hotel afterwards, we caught our breath before we had dinner, and took in a pre-4th of July Fife & Drum concert, in the courtyard of Old City Hall. Very cool! Made me wish I had taken my high school fife lessons more seriously... Boston
All of this time-filling led to our eventual destination - we closed our evening with the free dress rehearsal of The Boston Pops, on The Esplanade. You literally enjoy the exact same 4th Of July show that will be broadcast live on national TV the next evening. We saw the entire dry run, with hosts Dr. Phil and Robin McGraw, plus guests like Steve Tyler & Joe Perry doing a couple of huge Aerosmith hits. And of course, The Boston Pops masterfully running through the famous “1812 Overture”. Absolutely surreal...
After experiencing the dress rehearsal for The Boston Pops Fireworks Spectacular however, we thought we might not want to be in a cozy little crowd of 500,000, for the real deal. So, we booked ourselves onto a “fireworks cruise”.
Which is how we eventually spent our first-ever Fourth of July, in the United States
When we arrived at the harbor the next afternoon, there were a couple of ships lined up, so we settled onto a bench, chatting with a nice couple from Chicago
There was one cruise boarding before ours, and we were surprised to notice that a modern, sleek twin-hulled catamaran was being loaded for that one. An older, somewhat rusty tub appeared to be the only one left for the next group - our group. You could hear the ripples of concern begin to circulate throughout the crowd on the dock...
So as not to allow those of us who had arrived early to get cold feet, they began to board The Rusty Tub. In the surprising crush of people anxious to embark on what looked like a retired tugboat, my wife and I ended up in the lower level, where we were about to enjoy a cozy three-hour sauna.
Once finally underway, I imagine it was with our safety in mind that The Rusty T made its way out to the “general area” of the fireworks, but kept to a very safe distance of what seemed like several miles away, in case I suppose any of the fireworks embers might ignite the original wood hull. We became concerned that we may ironically end up watching "The Spectacular" on a cell phone screen. Several Lions attending an international conference were quietly planning a mutiny, gathering up a supply of the onboard hot dogs - stiffer than billy clubs...
Suddenly though, the Floating Rust Barge hauled anchor over to another vantage point, where we could see the illumination of fireworks, from behind a row of tall buildings. The crew simulcast the audio of The Boston Pops over speakers throughout the ship. I’ve never, ever seen anything like it before. It was unforgettable...
We all had a few laughs on the cruise back to port, and nobody seemed to mind the accommodations that much anymore.
Rust is relative after all, as long as it floats you back home…
(© Dan St.Yves - the edited version of this column appeared in eVent Magazine, June 27, 2007)
Sunday, July 03, 2011
Chicken Scratch
(posted by weekend guest blogger, Charlie Chicken...)
Ahoy, hoomans!! Top a tha morn ta yez!!!
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Ole Charlie dasided ta git away frum it all - tha stress a big city life, tha smell a ma coop - I went campin’!!
How d’ya like ma insulated jacket?? Purty grand, eh? An it keeps ma gin chilled pretty good at tha same time!!
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Well, it was Canada long weekend after all, an I decided ta roll rite inta tha Forth A July - an American hollyday. I even foun ma fife from ma skool band, so I kin play Yankee Doodle, or whatever patriotic toons come forth, like tha hollyday!!
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Yakkee Doodle wuz a cartoon bird, with a friend called Chopper. Or Chompers - he wuz a big bulldog as I remember. I wonder if Yakkee wuz Yankee’s cousin?? I gotta learn me sum more about history an stuff...
Anyway, I’m all set fer the weekend, and more. I gotta bag a bird feed, sum fishin’ poles, and enuff beer ta float ma boat, if ya gits ma drift - an my boat will be driftin’, let me tell ya....
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Cheese Doodles. Crap!! All this talk about doodles, an I firgot ma cheese doodles!! Wut tha pluck...
Well, better ske-daddle off ta 7-11. Ain’t no way I kin survive tha wilds without ma doodles....
Cluck fer now!!
Saturday, July 02, 2011
Friday, July 01, 2011
Words WILL Collide, trust me...
I’m looking forward to being a panelist soon at an upcoming writers’ festival here in Calgary:
http://www.whenwordscollide.org/
You can also click on this link, and scroll waaaay down to see what I’ll be doing there:
http://www.whenwordscollide.org/program.php#panelists
Or not - looks like that link might not work. You can always cut and paste though!!
Hey, only about 19 more posts to go, before I hit # 2000!! (math was never my strong suit).
Chow for now!!
I’m looking forward to being a panelist soon at an upcoming writers’ festival here in Calgary:
http://www.whenwordscollide.org/
You can also click on this link, and scroll waaaay down to see what I’ll be doing there:
http://www.whenwordscollide.org/program.php#panelists
Or not - looks like that link might not work. You can always cut and paste though!!
Hey, only about 19 more posts to go, before I hit # 2000!! (math was never my strong suit).
Chow for now!!
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Stage West Calgary
“Don’t Hug Me” – A Review
The Thursday Morning “Somebody-Asked-Me-To, So-Here-I-Go” Review – Stage West Calgary’s production of “Don’t Hug Me”.
(soon to be a real and proper, even more comprehensive review in The Calgary Herald– link to follow!!)
I’ll be upfront and honest here – I had never heard of this production, prior to seeing the show last night. Imagine my surprise to discover that this charming little character comedy is part of a burgeoning franchise, with follow-ups such as “A Don't Hug Me Christmas Carol”, “A Don’t Hug Me County Fair”, and (coming soon) “Don’t Hug Me, I’m Pregnant”. I’m guessing “Don’t Hug Me, I’ve Got Gas” was soundly rejected during meetings with potential financers.
For U.S. productions, this Minnesota-set romp’s tag line is “It's Fargo Canada
Essentially, the four acts unfold in a Minnesota Winnipeg Calgary
The incessant cold eventually pits bar co-owner Gunner Johnson (Kieran Martin Murphy) against his wife Clara (Katherine Fadum) – Gunner pines for the soothing tropical breezes of Florida
Their waitress Bernice Lundstrom (Natascha Girgis), seems to be trapped in a parallel universe to Gunner’s – she wants to pursue a singing career, her
fiance Kanute Gunderson (Sheldon Bergstrom) would prefer to stay in Bunyan Bay and build on his growing empire of property holdings.
fiance Kanute Gunderson (Sheldon Bergstrom) would prefer to stay in Bunyan Bay and build on his growing empire of property holdings.
Enter Aarvid Gisselsen (David Leyshon), a travelling “Lifestyle Systems” salesman, who substitutes Karaoke for trombones to make the Music Man analogy work – and you’ve got all the elements you need for comical musical theatre.
Each and every performer is strong during their individual showcases. Rich vocals and great stage presence all around. Hard to pick a single stand-out, but after seeing him in three different musical productions now, I have to just say I surely hope Mr. Bergstrom is hunkering down in a recording studio on his days off.
You will laugh – of that there is no doubt. “Don’t Hug Me” is great fun.
And, I am going to be sitting down with director Bob Walton, an accomplished actor and playwright as well, in mere hours. That will be available as a free download soon thereafter, and I’ll link to The Herald review when that’s online.
That's all folks!
Chow for now!!
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
“I am going to need a bigger bucket....”
This is just one example of phrases a spouse does not want to hear as her partner hustles past her in the hall.
It could be as innocent as the discovery that his strawberry patch is far more productive than he dared dream, but more likely it is a concerned acknowledgment of why only professional plumbers should try loosening pipes, to “let them breath a little...”
Chow for now...
PS - 21 posts short of 2000!!!
This is just one example of phrases a spouse does not want to hear as her partner hustles past her in the hall.
It could be as innocent as the discovery that his strawberry patch is far more productive than he dared dream, but more likely it is a concerned acknowledgment of why only professional plumbers should try loosening pipes, to “let them breath a little...”
Chow for now...
PS - 21 posts short of 2000!!!
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
The Society For The Smarter Naming Of Cartoon Dogs - Preliminary Minutes
Aside from Wonder Dog, was there a shortage of practical names back in the early days of cartoon dogs?
For example, what exactly is a “scooby doo”, aside from part of the lyrics of a Frank Sinatra song?
Or how about “Huckleberry Hound? Was this poor beast raised on so many huckleberries, he was saddled with that nickname for the rest of his life?? Surely he must have enjoyed the odd scrap of meat??
What exactly was Underdog under?? The bed? Underfoot? The weather?? Was there an Overdog???
Snoopy - wasn’t he just curious? How snoopy can a dog really be?? Unless you caught him with a camera, I wouldn’t be too worried about that sort of behaviour...
Deputy Dawg - I’m sorry - who did the Deputy report to? Sheriff Schnauzer? Lieutenant Labrador? Maybe if he would have learned how to spell “dog” he may have been promoted himself...
Santa’s Little Helper - Set aside for just a moment the annoyance of THAT lengthy moniker when calling for your pet to come for dinner, uh - no...that’s all I got...
Motion to adjourn carried...
Chow for now!!
Aside from Wonder Dog, was there a shortage of practical names back in the early days of cartoon dogs?
For example, what exactly is a “scooby doo”, aside from part of the lyrics of a Frank Sinatra song?
Or how about “Huckleberry Hound? Was this poor beast raised on so many huckleberries, he was saddled with that nickname for the rest of his life?? Surely he must have enjoyed the odd scrap of meat??
What exactly was Underdog under?? The bed? Underfoot? The weather?? Was there an Overdog???
Snoopy - wasn’t he just curious? How snoopy can a dog really be?? Unless you caught him with a camera, I wouldn’t be too worried about that sort of behaviour...
Deputy Dawg - I’m sorry - who did the Deputy report to? Sheriff Schnauzer? Lieutenant Labrador? Maybe if he would have learned how to spell “dog” he may have been promoted himself...
Santa’s Little Helper - Set aside for just a moment the annoyance of THAT lengthy moniker when calling for your pet to come for dinner, uh - no...that’s all I got...
Motion to adjourn carried...
Chow for now!!
Monday, June 27, 2011
I Got Nuthin’....
Well, it is inevitable that when you blog every day, and don’t always use old newspaper columns, or current entertainment reviews, or rants about why 5 toes on each foot may be a bit of overkill - one day you will find yourself sitting at the keyboard, with literally nothing to say.
This has happened here on a semi-regular basis over the years. Some might argue it’s hard to tell from most days that I do post actual content. Considering this post will place me just 24 shy of 2000 consecutive posts, I say to th(os)e critic(s) “hey, it’s not like I get paid to do this...”
So, knowing that I am rapidly approaching a landmark...uh, landmark, I had better direct my energies to HAVING something to say here, as I approach my 2000th post.
Until then, for today - nuthin’.
Chow for now...
Sunday, June 26, 2011
A Husband’s Guide To Cleaning A Dish
Step 1:
Use dish for meal. Enjoy meal.
Step 2:
Leave dish in sink. Note: The dish may remain in sink temporarily. Do not be alarmed, this will eventually resolve itself. It is quite like magic, as it eventually disappears, then returns back in cupboard.
Step 3:
Repeat Step 1 & 2.
Coming soon: How socks and underwear rejuvenate.
Chow for now!!
Step 1:
Use dish for meal. Enjoy meal.
Step 2:
Leave dish in sink. Note: The dish may remain in sink temporarily. Do not be alarmed, this will eventually resolve itself. It is quite like magic, as it eventually disappears, then returns back in cupboard.
Step 3:
Repeat Step 1 & 2.
Coming soon: How socks and underwear rejuvenate.
Chow for now!!
Saturday, June 25, 2011
Chicken Scratch
(posted by weekend guest blogger Charlie Chicken...)
PSYCHEDELIC, MAN!!!!
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Far-out, dude! Tryin’ out idees fer ma album cover, if I ever record an album. Not sure uv wut, but it could happen...
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
First off, lemme reashur ya, no chickens wuz harmed in tha takin’ uv that picture. Although ma crown still feels a lil stretchy...
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Fer real, wut would I record an album uv?? I can rap, or at least unrap...
I wunder if there’s a market fer cacklin’ ?? “Cacklin’ Rosie”??? Git on bored!!
Mebbe impressions? I do a mean robin!!
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
This clearly needs more thought. But at least I gotsa good potenshul album cover, which is really more impotent than what’s on tha stoopid thing....
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Cluck fer now...
Friday, June 24, 2011
Where The Deer & The Antelope Play...
You know, If I wanted someone to give me a home, it probably wouldn’t be where the buffalo roam. I mean, I’ve got nothing against buffalo in general, and I do enjoy bison as a healthy, lean meal - but those darn buffalo are not welcome to roam around my backyard. They’re hairy, smelly, and I’m not even talking about the mess they leave behind. Grass doesn’t smell that bad BEFORE they “process” it!!
I’m really not all that keen about deer and antelope playing, the more I think about it. What are they playing? Hide N Seek? Tag?? Hopscotch??? They may be nimble, but a group of antler-bearers playing in your yard is a recipe for disaster, especially if you are a hot air balloon hobbyist. Or a frequently bending gardener, for that matter...
So I am afraid that I stand as a discouraging word for roaming buffalo, and rambunctious deer and antelope. Go find a nice open prairie, and then you can do what you want without affecting me.
Just sayin'...
Chow for now...
You know, If I wanted someone to give me a home, it probably wouldn’t be where the buffalo roam. I mean, I’ve got nothing against buffalo in general, and I do enjoy bison as a healthy, lean meal - but those darn buffalo are not welcome to roam around my backyard. They’re hairy, smelly, and I’m not even talking about the mess they leave behind. Grass doesn’t smell that bad BEFORE they “process” it!!
I’m really not all that keen about deer and antelope playing, the more I think about it. What are they playing? Hide N Seek? Tag?? Hopscotch??? They may be nimble, but a group of antler-bearers playing in your yard is a recipe for disaster, especially if you are a hot air balloon hobbyist. Or a frequently bending gardener, for that matter...
So I am afraid that I stand as a discouraging word for roaming buffalo, and rambunctious deer and antelope. Go find a nice open prairie, and then you can do what you want without affecting me.
Just sayin'...
Chow for now...
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Mac Back (From The Road)
“It’s A Death Sentence!!”
Well, despite being an active participant, and presenting on behalf of two group topics at the recent “Easing The Burden Of Diabetes” conference in Toronto, I will likely be remembered best as the frazzled individual that blurted out “It’s A Death Sentence!!”, in response to a persistent participant. Wattaya gonna do??
It was in reaction to continued discussions regarding elevating the status of the disease, as it is a chronic, progressive disease that shortens your life, along with potentially devastating health consequences along that path. Often linked to heart disease, high blood pressure and cholesterol, it is without question a serious disease.
I think the participant was disagreeing with our group from a treatment/care level. Which I can respect, even though I do tend to feel that ignoring the severity of the complications without proper treatment is building the affected person up to fail, I think the group was pretty much unanimous in agreeing that we need to elevate the status of diabetes, to a place at the table with the other serious diseases. And make no mistake, it is a disease, doctors don’t diagnose and prescribe lifelong treatment for “may be bad”...
So, clearly I overreacted. My bad. But we did succeed in fleshing out a comprehensive set of topics for The Canadian Diabetes Association to consider, moving forward.
Chow for now!
“It’s A Death Sentence!!”
Well, despite being an active participant, and presenting on behalf of two group topics at the recent “Easing The Burden Of Diabetes” conference in Toronto, I will likely be remembered best as the frazzled individual that blurted out “It’s A Death Sentence!!”, in response to a persistent participant. Wattaya gonna do??
It was in reaction to continued discussions regarding elevating the status of the disease, as it is a chronic, progressive disease that shortens your life, along with potentially devastating health consequences along that path. Often linked to heart disease, high blood pressure and cholesterol, it is without question a serious disease.
I think the participant was disagreeing with our group from a treatment/care level. Which I can respect, even though I do tend to feel that ignoring the severity of the complications without proper treatment is building the affected person up to fail, I think the group was pretty much unanimous in agreeing that we need to elevate the status of diabetes, to a place at the table with the other serious diseases. And make no mistake, it is a disease, doctors don’t diagnose and prescribe lifelong treatment for “may be bad”...
So, clearly I overreacted. My bad. But we did succeed in fleshing out a comprehensive set of topics for The Canadian Diabetes Association to consider, moving forward.
Chow for now!
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Mac On The Road - Day Three (Epilogue...)
It’s over. Well, after today’s shortened session, the “Easing The Burden of Diabetes” conference I’m here in Toronto attending wraps up, and I’m back off to Calgary, to see if Mrs. That Dan Guy has spent the entire past few days in Bingo Palace dabbing her little heart out. She does love to Bingo...
Just a few thoughts - this event I believe is intended to set the scope and direction for the Canadian Diabetes Association for the next few years, and 12 separate topics have been brainstormed. Can’t wait to see which one gains the dominant theme by day’s end. I’m putting my money on “Less sugar, more carrots”!!
The morning after I arrived here, I discovered that even though I had managed to remember packing a deck of cards, sunscreen, lint brushes, shoe horns, hand cream and a collapsible umbrella in my travel bag, I had in fact failed to bring a hair brush - not something that is entirely necessary for a rampaging bladie, but it does tend to groom those wayward remaining hairs.
This set me off on a tour of hotel and airport “gift” shops, where something like a single Kleenex can run upwards of twenty dollars. After searching out what I though to be the best deal, I returned to my room, and put the new brush into use. When the scars close and heal, I should be able to brush my hair once more. It was as effective (and soothing) as a garden weed remover. I’m not sure a switchblade knife could have sliced me better.
Finally, just a note for future trips. My room was on the third floor, which sounds lofty - not penthouse lofty, but lofty enough.
As I am wont to do when I arrive at hotel rooms, I took off most of my external clothing, to allow my body to breath in the relaxing ambience of the room. I noticed that the window was open, but it was the third floor after all. So, clad only in my underwear, I ambled over to close the blinds.
Which looked down on a second-floor parkade, extremely active I thought for that time of the day. So far, no representative from the hotel has visited my room, so the I believe I may escape charges of indecent exposure. One thing for sure, I will not dance towards an open window again...
Off to my meetings!
Chow for now...
It’s over. Well, after today’s shortened session, the “Easing The Burden of Diabetes” conference I’m here in Toronto attending wraps up, and I’m back off to Calgary, to see if Mrs. That Dan Guy has spent the entire past few days in Bingo Palace dabbing her little heart out. She does love to Bingo...
Just a few thoughts - this event I believe is intended to set the scope and direction for the Canadian Diabetes Association for the next few years, and 12 separate topics have been brainstormed. Can’t wait to see which one gains the dominant theme by day’s end. I’m putting my money on “Less sugar, more carrots”!!
The morning after I arrived here, I discovered that even though I had managed to remember packing a deck of cards, sunscreen, lint brushes, shoe horns, hand cream and a collapsible umbrella in my travel bag, I had in fact failed to bring a hair brush - not something that is entirely necessary for a rampaging bladie, but it does tend to groom those wayward remaining hairs.
This set me off on a tour of hotel and airport “gift” shops, where something like a single Kleenex can run upwards of twenty dollars. After searching out what I though to be the best deal, I returned to my room, and put the new brush into use. When the scars close and heal, I should be able to brush my hair once more. It was as effective (and soothing) as a garden weed remover. I’m not sure a switchblade knife could have sliced me better.
Finally, just a note for future trips. My room was on the third floor, which sounds lofty - not penthouse lofty, but lofty enough.
As I am wont to do when I arrive at hotel rooms, I took off most of my external clothing, to allow my body to breath in the relaxing ambience of the room. I noticed that the window was open, but it was the third floor after all. So, clad only in my underwear, I ambled over to close the blinds.
Which looked down on a second-floor parkade, extremely active I thought for that time of the day. So far, no representative from the hotel has visited my room, so the I believe I may escape charges of indecent exposure. One thing for sure, I will not dance towards an open window again...
Off to my meetings!
Chow for now...
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Mac On The Road - Day Two
Well, this morning I hit the ground running (and therefore jiggling) for Day Two of the “Easing The Burden Of Diabetes” conference that I am here in Toronto attending. Quite an event so far, I can hardly wait to see where the path takes us the next two days.
Did I mention that I flew in to town while watching young golfer Rory McIlroy win the....wait for it...111th U.S. Open - well of course he did!
Mrs. That Dan Guy stayed behind for this trip, even though I was going to smuggle her into my hotel room. She would be amazed to know that not only did I try some sort of exotic asagio bisk soup for lunch yesterday, but I quite enjoyed it! Bisk me up, Scotty!!
Auctioned off an organ to afford the in-room internet, so that I could post my Tweet and Blog today. Funny, we live in a world where web access is right on our smartphones, yet hotels still feel they can justify charging champagne prices for the service. If I ever lose enough weight on my husky fingers, I’ll tell them EXACTLY where they can put that in-room internet charge...
Anyway, better get down to breakfast. More fun and loads of work yet to be done!
Chow for now...
Well, this morning I hit the ground running (and therefore jiggling) for Day Two of the “Easing The Burden Of Diabetes” conference that I am here in Toronto attending. Quite an event so far, I can hardly wait to see where the path takes us the next two days.
Did I mention that I flew in to town while watching young golfer Rory McIlroy win the....wait for it...111th U.S. Open - well of course he did!
Mrs. That Dan Guy stayed behind for this trip, even though I was going to smuggle her into my hotel room. She would be amazed to know that not only did I try some sort of exotic asagio bisk soup for lunch yesterday, but I quite enjoyed it! Bisk me up, Scotty!!
Auctioned off an organ to afford the in-room internet, so that I could post my Tweet and Blog today. Funny, we live in a world where web access is right on our smartphones, yet hotels still feel they can justify charging champagne prices for the service. If I ever lose enough weight on my husky fingers, I’ll tell them EXACTLY where they can put that in-room internet charge...
Anyway, better get down to breakfast. More fun and loads of work yet to be done!
Chow for now...
Monday, June 20, 2011
Mac On The Road-Day One
Off to a swimming start. Hotel is playing usual game of "guess how we've stored your name in the database", which is restricting me from logging into free lobby wireless. In an age where most phones have Internet, they charge a hideous amount for in-room access.
Running late, sessions start soon, more later when I resolve this. For now, thank the Internet gods for I-Phone access...
Chow for now!!
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Running late, sessions start soon, more later when I resolve this. For now, thank the Internet gods for I-Phone access...
Chow for now!!
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Road Trip!!
I’m off later today to Toronto, the large city in Canada that didn’t have a hockey riot. And coming along for the trip, “Miracle on The Ridge” - my trusty Macbook. This will be the first time I get to test many of the functions outside of the home.
You know, I used to go into a Starbucks, and look at all the scholarly folks inside working away industriously on their Apple computers. I longed to be one of them, and even grew a soul patch in anticipation of the day I might once be fortunate enough to join their ranks.
Well, now I have, and the upside (along with the wonder that is the Mac world) is that my soul patch ended up being an irresistible “amour” magnet for Mrs. That Dan Guy. Never have I see her react as she has to this slightly askew strip of chin hair of mine. What an animal!!
At any rate, I intend to test a number of mobile computing options on this short trip, while I also participate in the future direction of The Canadian Diabetes Association.
Stay tuned campers - as you know, I like to over-promise, and under-deliver!!
Or however that phrase goes...
Chow for now!!
(Oh yeah, Happy Father's Day!!)
I’m off later today to Toronto, the large city in Canada that didn’t have a hockey riot. And coming along for the trip, “Miracle on The Ridge” - my trusty Macbook. This will be the first time I get to test many of the functions outside of the home.
You know, I used to go into a Starbucks, and look at all the scholarly folks inside working away industriously on their Apple computers. I longed to be one of them, and even grew a soul patch in anticipation of the day I might once be fortunate enough to join their ranks.
Well, now I have, and the upside (along with the wonder that is the Mac world) is that my soul patch ended up being an irresistible “amour” magnet for Mrs. That Dan Guy. Never have I see her react as she has to this slightly askew strip of chin hair of mine. What an animal!!
At any rate, I intend to test a number of mobile computing options on this short trip, while I also participate in the future direction of The Canadian Diabetes Association.
Stay tuned campers - as you know, I like to over-promise, and under-deliver!!
Or however that phrase goes...
Chow for now!!
(Oh yeah, Happy Father's Day!!)
Saturday, June 18, 2011
Chicken Scratch
(posted by a weekend guest blogger clearly unfamiliar with that old saying about curiosity and cats, Charlie Chicken...)
Howdy hoomans!!
Anyone gots any idea wut these things is? I wuz rootin’ aroun in tha kitchen fer a toothpick, and came across these pointy beasts. Is they pig-stickers??
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Mebbe they’re fer roastin’ marshmellers over a fire? Hot dogs? Little pataters?? They come inna pair, which makes 'em even more curious!
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Mebbe they’re sum kinda weapon, the hoomans here hide fer quick access in case a introoders? If I live ta be six, I don’t think I’ll ever fully understand what it is that hoomans do...
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Ya know, I could just pocket one uv ‘em, fer later on. THAT would sure wake up Dum-Dum inna hurry tomorrow mornin'!!
Yeah...that’s the ticket....hee hee hee....
Cluck fer now!!
Friday, June 17, 2011
Haven’t seen our resident vole in quite awhile. I fear the groundskeepers here (we live in a strata complex) may have...umm..terminated his tenancy. We will choose to believe that Ari was humanely relocated, to a larger grasslands setting. Even though that grasslands realistically may be in the sky....
I’d like to say that we are gearing up for summer here, but with our furnace still blasting away thanks to high humidity levels (even Noah knew when it was time to bail on Terra Firma and board the SS Bon Voyage...), it seems like summer is one of those fabled dreams, like a Canadian hockey team winning the Stanley Cup.
On a brighter note, Mrs. That Dan Guy is finally getting to the tail end of a brutal flu bug that has knocked her out for about a week now. I don’t want to suggest that she’s spent too much time blowing her schnozz around here, but Rudolph has filed a grievance with the Red-Nosed Reindeer Union. I would advise you to do like I’ve recently done, and buy stocks in Kleenex...
Another day in our world!!
Chow for now!!
I’d like to say that we are gearing up for summer here, but with our furnace still blasting away thanks to high humidity levels (even Noah knew when it was time to bail on Terra Firma and board the SS Bon Voyage...), it seems like summer is one of those fabled dreams, like a Canadian hockey team winning the Stanley Cup.
On a brighter note, Mrs. That Dan Guy is finally getting to the tail end of a brutal flu bug that has knocked her out for about a week now. I don’t want to suggest that she’s spent too much time blowing her schnozz around here, but Rudolph has filed a grievance with the Red-Nosed Reindeer Union. I would advise you to do like I’ve recently done, and buy stocks in Kleenex...
Another day in our world!!
Chow for now!!
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Vancouver Riots
Stanley Cup Final
We tag animals, to monitor and track them in the wild. We’re then able to gain insight into their habits, or take action if they seem to have lost their way.
I think this may be the direction for large public gatherings after the devastation by “fans” that rioted in Vancouver last night, after the Canucks lost the Stanley Cup to Boston.
Watching the scene unfold live after the game and as it escalated through until I went to bed, it’s clear that a small percentage of knuckleheads (I’m being charitable with that description) were Hell-bent on creating utter mayhem, regardless of which team won the game.
For me, the most compelling footage so far is of a more mature individual trying to stop some thugs, who then gets pulled in by the crowd, beaten, thrown to the ground and kicked into critical condition. There is no punishment severe enough for nitwits that seem to feel they are justified in these sorts of actions.
Fence off these outdoor areas. Require wristbands, and photo ID before revelers are allowed to enter, which can then be used to match the photos taken after this sort of horrific behaviour. From there, the authorities can proceed directly to the homes of these criminals, and charge them to the fullest extent of the law.
It’s not just post-game fun. It’s theft, destruction of personal and public property, and in some cases - attempted murder.
Chow for now.
Stanley Cup Final
We tag animals, to monitor and track them in the wild. We’re then able to gain insight into their habits, or take action if they seem to have lost their way.
I think this may be the direction for large public gatherings after the devastation by “fans” that rioted in Vancouver last night, after the Canucks lost the Stanley Cup to Boston.
Watching the scene unfold live after the game and as it escalated through until I went to bed, it’s clear that a small percentage of knuckleheads (I’m being charitable with that description) were Hell-bent on creating utter mayhem, regardless of which team won the game.
For me, the most compelling footage so far is of a more mature individual trying to stop some thugs, who then gets pulled in by the crowd, beaten, thrown to the ground and kicked into critical condition. There is no punishment severe enough for nitwits that seem to feel they are justified in these sorts of actions.
Fence off these outdoor areas. Require wristbands, and photo ID before revelers are allowed to enter, which can then be used to match the photos taken after this sort of horrific behaviour. From there, the authorities can proceed directly to the homes of these criminals, and charge them to the fullest extent of the law.
It’s not just post-game fun. It’s theft, destruction of personal and public property, and in some cases - attempted murder.
Chow for now.
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Scroll back to the June 13th post - the song remains the same...
Hey, what’s the Italian word for “porous”?
Luongo!!
GO BRUINS!!!!
Ahem...
So, my trip to Banff was a blast, aside from the shock of paying for the privilege of entering the resort city. I was a participant in a diabetes event for a big pharmaceutical company. I shared my “journey with diabetes”, which was intended to humanize the ongoing treatment of the disease. Kind of a great warm-up for another event I’m attending next week - where the Canadian Diabetes Association hopes to ramp up their efforts nationally.
“Hi, I’m Dan, and I’m a diabetic.”
Not so diabetic that I can’t be rooting whole-heartedly for my team tonight!!
Chow for now...
Hey, what’s the Italian word for “porous”?
Luongo!!
GO BRUINS!!!!
Ahem...
So, my trip to Banff was a blast, aside from the shock of paying for the privilege of entering the resort city. I was a participant in a diabetes event for a big pharmaceutical company. I shared my “journey with diabetes”, which was intended to humanize the ongoing treatment of the disease. Kind of a great warm-up for another event I’m attending next week - where the Canadian Diabetes Association hopes to ramp up their efforts nationally.
“Hi, I’m Dan, and I’m a diabetic.”
Not so diabetic that I can’t be rooting whole-heartedly for my team tonight!!
Chow for now...
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Some kind of hockey game last night! Well, no matter who you’re rooting for (smart money’s on Boston), whichever team wins the next dust-up takes home Lord Stanley’s cup! Hope they run it through the dishwasher before it gets handed out...
I’m off to Ban-f-f later today, to participate in a diabetes event. I’m in some demand lately - next week I’m involved in another national initiative for the Canadian Diabetes Association. Who knew all those chocolate bars would eventually pay off?
Sort of...
Sympathetic thoughts requested, folks! Mrs. That Dan Guy is currently home sick with a brutal cold. While I would offer my own sympathetic thoughts, I am doing my best to give her a wide berth, staying in my own germ-free zone. As bad as I feel that she is sick, it’s far harder on her when I’M sick - I suffer poorly...
Chow for now!!
I’m off to Ban-f-f later today, to participate in a diabetes event. I’m in some demand lately - next week I’m involved in another national initiative for the Canadian Diabetes Association. Who knew all those chocolate bars would eventually pay off?
Sort of...
Sympathetic thoughts requested, folks! Mrs. That Dan Guy is currently home sick with a brutal cold. While I would offer my own sympathetic thoughts, I am doing my best to give her a wide berth, staying in my own germ-free zone. As bad as I feel that she is sick, it’s far harder on her when I’M sick - I suffer poorly...
Chow for now!!
Monday, June 13, 2011
Truth be told, I don’t really have a horse in this race tonight (Game 6, Stanley Cup finals).
Sure, it would have been nice to see The Bruins hoist the cup on home ice tonight, but if it takes seven games, well then - so be it. Like I say, I don’t really have a vested interest in either team. As long as Vancouver loses, I’m happy!
But if the Canucks somehow happen to fill that Grand Canyon-sized hole between Luongo’s legs and win the game tonight, I will take in stride, and be just as happy, knowing that Boston did a fine job - although it would have been a better job if they had won, and then also took Game Seven.
It’s liberating actually, not picking sides in this. All the stress associated with rooting for one particular team is gone, and I can honestly say that if Boston wins tonight, I will be just as happy as I would if Vancouver had lost. One way or the other, no worries.
It's a whole new me!
Chow for now!
Sure, it would have been nice to see The Bruins hoist the cup on home ice tonight, but if it takes seven games, well then - so be it. Like I say, I don’t really have a vested interest in either team. As long as Vancouver loses, I’m happy!
But if the Canucks somehow happen to fill that Grand Canyon-sized hole between Luongo’s legs and win the game tonight, I will take in stride, and be just as happy, knowing that Boston did a fine job - although it would have been a better job if they had won, and then also took Game Seven.
It’s liberating actually, not picking sides in this. All the stress associated with rooting for one particular team is gone, and I can honestly say that if Boston wins tonight, I will be just as happy as I would if Vancouver had lost. One way or the other, no worries.
It's a whole new me!
Chow for now!
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Friday, June 10, 2011
Had a great time interviewing Calgary-born actor and singer Nicholas Fera yesterday, for the second time. Shot some video this time around, which I hope to have available over the next few days. One thing will be abundantly clear - I ain’t Oprah!!
However, Nicholas’ enthusiasm is infectious. He made me realize how long I’ve been standing in the same spot. You grow, or you die - and I’ve got no immediate plans to start shopping for pine boxes.
I don’t want to go getting all touchy-feely here (especially since Mrs. That Dan Guy is at work - that would just be wrong...), but you often only get one chance at what you hope to achieve in life, and I seem to keep getting more and more do-overs. I’d better start listening to karma, or whatever is trying to point me in the right direction, before they start going back to guiding Charlie Sheen.
That would just be a damn shame...
Chow for now!! (Don’t forget to check back for a link to that interview!!)
However, Nicholas’ enthusiasm is infectious. He made me realize how long I’ve been standing in the same spot. You grow, or you die - and I’ve got no immediate plans to start shopping for pine boxes.
I don’t want to go getting all touchy-feely here (especially since Mrs. That Dan Guy is at work - that would just be wrong...), but you often only get one chance at what you hope to achieve in life, and I seem to keep getting more and more do-overs. I’d better start listening to karma, or whatever is trying to point me in the right direction, before they start going back to guiding Charlie Sheen.
That would just be a damn shame...
Chow for now!! (Don’t forget to check back for a link to that interview!!)
Thursday, June 09, 2011
I have decided that I would like to become a martial arts expert. I would like to register my hands with the FBI, not my hams.
I can see myself leaping from behind a bush, springing to battle readiness with my Crouching Tigger, Hidden Braggin’.
I would dazzle my Sensei with the breathtaking speed of my sprung palms, as I snatched the pebble from his hand. I would make Miss Piggy weep with inadequacy at the heartiness of my own “Hi-Yaah!!”
I believe I could pull off a white jumpsuit. Even Vegas Elvis made that work for a few years. I’ve already got a brown belt, so one quick trip to Wal-Mart and I’ll have a black one.
Yes, I believe I could be one frightening martial arts expert...
Chow for now!!
Wednesday, June 08, 2011
I sure hope Blogger isn’t about to die on me. Now that I’ve got everything configured, it would sure suck to have to start all over in another blogging environment, let alone lose all my history.
A colleague of mine lost her entire site earlier this year. My sister is having troubles, and now I seem to have to log-in every time I use it. You can only blame so many technology challenges on Windows Vista, after all.
Well, time will tell. Let’s just hope I don’t have to start over, and recreate 5 years of daily posts. Posts that really should find a place in Canada’s version of The Smithsonian. Canada’s version of The Pulitzer Hall Of Fame.
Canada’s version of Ripley’s Believe It Or Not....
Chow for now!!
A colleague of mine lost her entire site earlier this year. My sister is having troubles, and now I seem to have to log-in every time I use it. You can only blame so many technology challenges on Windows Vista, after all.
Well, time will tell. Let’s just hope I don’t have to start over, and recreate 5 years of daily posts. Posts that really should find a place in Canada’s version of The Smithsonian. Canada’s version of The Pulitzer Hall Of Fame.
Canada’s version of Ripley’s Believe It Or Not....
Chow for now!!
Tuesday, June 07, 2011
I’ve been polishing my apple this morning. Sorry, my Apple.
It’s white, which with me is like giving a balloon-padded room to a rhinoceros. Even wearing white cotton gloves, I’m able to smear the poor thing with paw prints, maybe even hair gel. I don’t know - I’m just gifted that way...
On the plus side, I’ll always know which one is mine when I go to pick it up at the Apple daycare...
Chow for now.
Monday, June 06, 2011
Today I offer you a new twist on an old classic. This was previously a two-part epic in my former weekly newspaper column, but now I’ve scaled it down and freshened it up:
This is why someone that is not in the least bit handy shouldn’t try being a handyman. Or at least, it’s a cautionary tale about impulse purchases. Especially mail-order ladders...
Chow for now!!
Sunday, June 05, 2011
Hey, I’m starting to work on reloading my main website (finally).
I’ve been playing around with several site builders, and hosts, but I just happened to spot something while working on “Miracle On The Ridge”, as I like to refer to this wonderful, amazing, astonishing, life-altering, Mrs.-That-Dan-Guy-Hates-It Macbook.
Apple has something called iWeb (of COURSE it does!) - a built-in website builder.
Aye Caramba!!
Just started playing around, let me know what you think of where this is going:
Is it too busy? Too distracting? Too wonderful for words??
Depending on initial reactions, I will finally get www.nonsenseandstuff.com back up and running, with the shining, guiding hand of Apple.
I am just not worthy....
Chow for now!!
Saturday, June 04, 2011
Chicken Scratch
(posted by weekend guest blogger Charlie Chicken...)
Ahoy, hoomans! It’s Movie Nite in tha coop - on tap tonight, well...I ain’t planned that far ahead yet - have ta see wut’s on basic cable, cause tha skinflint homeowners here restrict my access!!
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Not even sure wut I’m in tha mood for - probably action/adventure, but I could go fer a comedy. One thing fer sure - it ain’t gonna be a chick flick - Yuk Yuk Yuk!!!!!
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
OMG, I’s one funny berd!!
Hey, mebbe I oughta surf tha Googler, an download a movie! Mebbe then I could watch something from this century! Can’t even browse tha PVR here - tha wierdos I share tha house with fill tha hard drive with Barney and Celebrity Rehab.
Oh, wait...tha’s their relatives!!
BUK-AAAAWK!!!!
Hey, mebbe I can watch a cartoon marathon! I do love that wacky Foghorn Leghorn and his little pal!! I say, I say boy...
Ya juss can’t beat tha classics!!
Cluck fer now...
Friday, June 03, 2011
Barry was a whack-a-mole. Traveling from town to town in county fairs, Barry would spend his days and nights getting (or trying to avoid being) whacked on his furry little noggin by a large mallet. As dreams go, this was never high on Barry’s list.
But his father had been a whack-a-mole, and his grandfather before that. A long and proud legacy, even though they had all retired young, spending their evenings befuddled on a recliner rocker, howling spittle at contestants on Wheel Of Fortune unable to solve even the simplest puzzles...
Barry would look around every time he poked his head through the hole - and see a world of wonder. A world where LOOK OUT - HAMMER TIME a world where couples walked hand in hand, and MALLET - DUCK!! cotton candy wisped gaily along in children’s hands.
Barry began to plot. Plot anarchy. He hissed to his fellow whack-a-moles while they went below the surface of the game. “Why are we doing this to ourselves? We can be free! There’s a land right outside of this game, where pleasure awaits, and Tylenol is not necessary!”
The spring beneath Barry propelled him up at that moment, where a savvy game player lay in wait. Barry never even saw it coming. The mole was whacked...
Please supply the moral of this tale:____________________________________
Chow for now!
Thursday, June 02, 2011
When Harry met Sally, he had spent about a week sleepless in Seattle. Why, no one really knows. He had been notting off on the hill, but just couldn’t seem to drift off for any substantial length of time.
Sally was a pretty woman, but Harry had always felt more interested in Mary - there was just something about Mary. Somewhere in time, things being different, it might have been Sally, but Harry pined for Mary.
Attending my best friend’s wedding, I found a love note Sally had written Harry. I told him, you’ve got mail, but to no avail. He was like Shakespeare in love - a doomed, tragic figure. In love with a lady in red.
Funny thing love, actually. You can go to four weddings and a funeral, and find evidence of love at all of those diverse events. You may have even dreamed of it while you were sleeping. But achieving, it..well, sometimes you are more likely to be moonstruck.
Chow for now!!
Wednesday, June 01, 2011
Man, did we ever have a great trip to Boston back in July of 2006. I had a few newspaper columns come out of that visit, and I’ve now decided to revisit my files to see if I can’t squeeze a few more out. We did so much in that beautiful, historic city on the harbour.
Here’s just one tiny sample from these blog archives:
Yeah, Boston - one great city. Hope we get back there some day...
By the way, congrats hometown Winnipeg on getting an NHL team back - sorry, I’ll still have to cheer for The Flames :-)
Chow for now!!
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