Barbecuing A Chicken

1) Distract chicken by pointing off to the opposite direction of his field of vision.

2) Bonk chicken over head, hard enough to ensure he is unconscious.

3) Eviscerate, whilst wondering why you didn't just buy chicken parts at the supermarket instead...

4) Coat in BBQ sauce.

5) Grill.

6) Enjoy.

7) Reconcile with process by concluding that the chicken was headed in this direction regardless, so not really as cruel as it all sounds...

8) Suck it up man, it was a chicken! Dry your eyes and move on!!

9) The service for the bones and beak was lovely - I'm sure you have  more than atoned for what you did to the poor little fella...

10) Have you considered barbecuing a zucchini as you transition into becoming a vegetarian?

Later!