Chicken Scratch

Hello, mangy mammals!

Ole Charlie here, even tho techikally ya can’t see me.

So, what with the North American economy in such turmoil, we’re havin’ to make some hard decisions here at the chicken ranch. Not a “chicken ranch” like they gots in Nevada – we wouldn’t be in hot water if that wuz wut we had here. I mean a collection of chickens on the open prairie, if by "prairie" you mean "modern home with plumbin’ and heatin"…

BUK-AAAAWK!!!!

Anyhows, where wuz I? Oh yeah…here at the chicken shack, we’ve been forced to look in the mirror, and do some belt-tightenin’. We hadda buy a belt to tightn it, but that’s beside the point…

BUK-AAAAWK!!!!

We all drew straws, and sadly, poor old Cornelius is havin’ ta make a bit of a sacrifice – we’re puttin’ him on e-Bay.

Now we hope he stays somewhere in the neighbourhood, or at least the province, but we have promised him that anyone who bids on his sorry butt-awks has gotta keep him alive. For example, if someone with a collection of secret herbs and spices indicates interest, we will automatically disquantify that bid. If someone expresses an interest in how Corny fares in small-ring fightin’ – we will also fourbid that bidder.

BUK-AAAAWK!!!!

We will hope to find Corny a nice new home, with plenty of straw on the ground, and corn to peck at. If we get a good enough buck for him, we can get that widescreen TV the little cluckers keep chirpin’ for. Hey, tis a selfless poultry that sacrifices for the greater good… Or some other sort of bushwah sayin’ – whatever gets us our HD TV!!

BUK-AAAAWK!!!!

Gotta run – folks, if ya ever wanted a half-blind, curly-headed chicken, here’s yer chance!!

Cluck for now!!!