Chicken Scratch

(posted by weekend guest blogger, Charlie Chicken…)

Howdy, humans!

The Great Poultini will attempt this mornin’ ta escape frum this pitchur. A pitchur that seems absolutely impossible ta escape from. Especially right now…

BUK-AAAAWK!!!!

The Great Poultini has come up with this amazing escape, after droppin’ his cigarette in earlier this mornin’ – I wusn’t about ta lose my pluckin' investment that easy…

BUK-AAAAWK!!!!

SO, how will I escape this dee-lemma? Well, thankfully I happen ta be a natural consortionist. Even if technically I haven’t been able ta feel my beak for at least half an hour now. An one a my knuckles. Or my pinfeathers, for that matter…

BUK-AAAAWK!!!!

The trick is gonna be how I consort my neck, like a goose – or a giraffe. That momentum will allow my body to rise like a coiled cobra, and exit this pitchur.

At least, thas tha plan. As of right now, my neck feels paralyzed, aside frum tha shooting pain radiatin’ down ta my giblets…

BUK-AAAAWK!!!!

Hey! I can see my cluckin’ wishbone! And thas not all, frankly. I got a perspective right now that just ain’t pretty…

Uhh…mebbe you should just go have some breaksfast right now, and coome back in a bit, ta see how I’m doin’.

The Great Poultini will escape. But right now, he needs to will sum circle-a-tion back inta his poultry bumps…

Cluck fer now!!