Grimm Indeed – Pigs In A Poke, Part Two

Once upon a time, there were three little piggies, or at least there were three - until one ran afoul of local building code compliance, and wound up converted to bacon bits, whilst idling inside his house of straw. An old mountain wolf who had come to their town was the unexpected beneficiary of the impromptu pig roast, smacking his old wolf lips in delight at his good fortune.

But that was yesterday, and old mountain wolves have needs. Specifically, a hunger, or a hankering if you will. So off he set, with a jaunt in his step, and BBQ sauce in his hip pocket.

Along the way, he came across the hastily-constructed abode of the second pig (Irwin, if you feel you must know) – his house constructed of sticks. No stones.

This was good news for the old wolf, who was suffering from diverticulitis, and needed more fibre in his diet. A toasted pork-sicle would fit the bill just dandily!

He knocked on the little pig’s door, and howled loudly:”Yo pig – can I borrow some eggs? I’m makin’ ham an eggs, I am!!”

The little pig replied: “Not by the hair of my chinny-chin chin.” Which frankly did little for his cause. The old wolf just huffed, puffed on his cherry-flavoured cigarillo, and lit the brittle house of sticks on fire. While setting his foot against the door. Piggy #2 was soon a side of ham.

While breakfast was cooking, a young girl with a red hood zipped by on a skateboard. The wolf asked where she was off to, after courteously offering her a bun-wich of roast pork to-go. Somewhat slightly suspicious, she made up a story about her grandmother’s house, when really she was racing to get to her favorite seat at The Bingo Castle. Wolfie made a mental note, and wished her well as she Tony Hawked over the curb, and off into the horizon.

Tomorrow- the conclusion - where we sincerely hope there’s an uplifting moral somewhere in the narrative…

Chow for now!