I must re-examine my life. I think my entire belief system is now being called into question. I am filled with embarrassment.

We’ve been clearing off TV programs recorded while we were away for two weeks, and last night we had an epiphany. Along with some chip dip and a nice Chardonnay…

What we discovered (surprisingly) was that after many years of disdaining (both verbally and in print) “reality” TV for many years now, those broadcasts were almost the only programming we deemed must-see TV for when we returned.

How did this happen? Where did we go wrong? Will we be glued to the set for Maury Povich and Jerry Springer in the coming weeks?? EGADS!!

Well, let’s examine this discomforting situation. Some of these programs are actually game shows, and others are mere fluff.

Gene Simmons’ Family Jewels: We admit – we love this show. Hardly reality TV though – more voyeur TV, as camera crews follow staged events intended to be perceived as real. You can hardly feel the tension as Gene is stranded in the desert, along with a camera crew and their fleet of buses. Still, the show is funny as heck.

Nashville Star: We’ve watched this show since it started, and always enjoyed it. This is truly what programmers consider reality TV, yet it has always seemed like a less offensive version of the Idol family of depressingly vacant television shows. More of a game show, in our eyes. Although this year with Billy Ray Cyrus hosting, and the lousiest crop of performers since Hee-Haw quit filming, may be our last season…

Celebrity Family Feud: Yes, we actually recorded this show, while we were away. Host Al Roker brings all the charm to this effort that he can muster, and yet he still comes across like a balloon leaking air. The thrill with this current resurrection is supposed to be “celebrity” families facing off for charities. The lights were rather dim in the episode we watched. Maybe if they could find Starsky or Hutch…

America’s Got Talent: We watched the first season, and avoided the second one like it carried contagious whooping mumps. Then we caught a commercial for Season Three, with a heart-string tugging preview, and tuned in. Now, we wished we hadn’t. If America truly does have talent, there ain’t ever very much on this broadcast…

How Do You Solve A Problem Like Maria: Canada’s reality show – a competition for the latest Maria, in a Canadian revival of “The Sound Of Music”. Sorry, United States, we’ve cornered the market on this one. You will miss the exciting TV experience of 10 girls competing to yodel “the hills are alive” in Toronto.

That, my friends, is what we’ve been watching since we returned from holidays…

Chow for now!!