I must apologize. My start today has been delayed greatly, mainly due to Mrs. That Dan Guy FAILING to rouse me from my slumbers (wow, one more letter in a word back there and this wouldn’t have been a very family-friendly blog…).

I awoke extremely late, well past the time I would have normally been out jogging, or mending various household items in my workshop. I’ve barely even had time to glance at the financial section of the newspapers I get every morning, to aid in advising the many people I talk to at the local “Y”, when I host my Sunday afternoon seminars. This is completely unacceptable!!

So, why did MTDG forget about me, you ask? Why would she leave me to slumber through everything I hold dear?

Well, she suggests she slept in herself (ha!), and that she was going to get me up at least for dinnertime, maybe before breakfast Monday morning.

I believe that there exists ample evidence to indicate she awoke at the crack of dawn, and has been busying herself with:

1) Off-site betting, on horse races across North America,
2) Secretly tuning into the John Stamos Network, which features non-stop episodes of Full House and ER, plus short biography snippets of Mr. Stamos…
3) Watching “Buy These Shoes”, an Italian DVD of the latest footwear offerings, hot off the press.
4) Revelling in the peace and quiet that she seems to believe only exists when I am unconscious,
5) Heartlessly and cruelly eating all the pink Fruit Loops herself, leaving NONE for her beloved husband…
6) Planning a ruse of some sort, that will take us later this afternoon to some secluded warehouse that specializes in group ballroom dance lessons. How many times do I have to tell her – during my pro football tryouts, I permanently injured my middle toes…

Well sister, I’m awake now! Good luck trying to pull your tom-foolery with my senses on heightened alert!

Chow for now!