thatdanguy's podcast

thatdanguy's podcast
CLICK ON THE PHOTO MONTAGE! Or, Free Downloads on i-Tunes!

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Candy Cane Safety Tips

Although candy canes are quite delicious, they are really quite useless as actual canes. Especially if you are a normal-sized human being.

So, here are just a few tips to help you avoid embarrassment if you are planning on using one in public:

1) Tie a couple of popsicle sticks around your candy cane, to firm it up and provide more support. Leaving the plastic wrap on will ensure that you may still be able to eat it after use as a cane...

2) Try to find a really large candy cane, like the size of the ones that people place in their front lawns. Walk on your knees if you are able, to make the cane a more practical size.

3) Do NOT bite the ears off of your candy cane before...wait, no...I may be confusing candy canes with Easter bunnies there...never mind...

4 Consider purchasing candy cane extensions - while expensive they will really trick out your cane and bring it to a more acceptable length for proper usage.

Well, I'm not sure if any of that advice will work for you this holiday season, but there it is anyway.

Ho Ho Ho???

Chow for now.


Mrs. That Dan Guy said...

OMG! That is hilarious! "Walk on your knees if you have to?"... "Trick out your cane?" OMG! Ridiculous!

ThatDanGuy said...

That's me!!