We are funny birds, Mrs. That Dan Guy and I...

Yesterday we had some friends over for dinner. To prepare, we went into a bit of a panic.

First off, we did a sweep of the home, to see what we needed to make it look complete and inviting. That ultimately involved myself casting a large piece of pottery from scratch, and MTDG having to weave curtains for several of our rooms. We also used a light meter to determine exactly how much drapery we needed to leave open in every room, for maximum effect and ambiance.

We took a one-night candle-making course, getting our bachelor's degree in beeswax proficiency.

Once the setting was picture-perfect, we did a stem-to-stern cleaning, using environmentally friendly products - like raw bleach and turpentine. Hey, you try getting chewing tobacco stains out of a white rug...

After the house was cleaned, we had to run to the corner store to use their bathroom, and we showered at the local "Y". We didn't dare have a single towel or strand of toilet paper look out of place. Martha Stewart would have looked like Oscar from the Odd Couple, compared to our entertaining preparation (which for the purpose of coding, we called preparation "H").

We gave Charlie what our doctor called "a mild sedation medication sufficient for subduing a rhinocerous with an impacted tooth". He behaved himself quite nicely, while reciting what few letters of the alphabet he could remember...

Finally, I recorded hours of flute and cello concertos, to play delicately in the background. I only wish I had read the titles of the songs beforehand. Even on woodwinds and strings, In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida and Smoke On The Water are pretty rockin'...

The visit was a success, so it was all worthwhile. I think we convinced out friends that we live like that (cultured and such) every single day, rather than the reality of spending our entire weekday nights in long underwear and t-shirts, eating every Frito-Lay product known to mankind....

Hope your weekend was a great one!

Chow for now!!