Chicken Scratch

Greetings, fleshy fur-bearers. I'm a chicken, and you're not....

Well, this may be one of the last postings I'm ever gonna make here. I got an offer to blow some blues harp in a new band, and I've accepted the offer. Now we just have to come up with a name.

Here's what we're tossin' around:

* "Red Rooster and his Little Peckers"

* "BB Chicken & The Side Dishes"

* "Hot Legs"

* "Captain Peck-Tastic & The Barn Yard Riots"

What a cluckin' hoot this is gonna be!! No more having to get up before the crack of noon to peck out this stupid column. We'll be tourin' the nation, and the two best things about that are:

1) we'll meet tons of hot chicks,

&

2) we'll meet tons of hot chicks!!!

I'll bet you didn't even know I was a big-time musician!! Yeah, I got started as a toddler, playing a plastic xylophone.

Buk-Buk-Buk....Buk-AAWK!!!!

Pardon me...

From there, I found a harmonica, and started learnin' how to play the great blues, stuff like Howlin' Woof, Slow Sonny Molasses, and Michael Bolton. Word musta got out, because now I'm gonna be hittin' the road, without even auditioning for an Idol show!!

So, have a good life, featherless mammals! You ain't gonna have Charlie to kick around anymore!!

Unless you come see me play live. Then you can buy me a few Boilermakers, and kick me as much as you wanna...

Cluck for now!!