Today, I'd like to take a few minutes, and answer some of the most common hypothetical questions I'd probably get, regarding this blog...

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1) Dear That Dan Guy,
How do you come up with all these wacky ideas for postings??

A: Well, Anonymous, it's rather simple. I just surf the Google, with random oddball words. You'd be surprised what can come up in a search for "Apache Hot Pants", or "carnivorous two-headed aardvarks"...

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2) Dear That Dan Guy,
You and your wife appear to go to an awful lot of shows and concerts. Are you guys independently wealthy??

A: Good question, Anonymous 2! And the answer is no. It's just that there's so many concerts available to see here. We actually pass on more than we go to.

For example, just due to time and financial constraints, we had to pass on Guns 'N' Roses, Aerosmith with Motley Crue, and Billy Talent. We also plan on passing on The Von Trapp Grandchildren (I'm not kidding), and Christina Aguilera, with The Pussycat Dolls.

Hey, wait just a minute...

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3) Dear That Dan Guy,
How did you become part of NHL Bloggers, considering you don't seem to know which end of a hockey stick sits on the ice??

A: Um, well, that's a good question, Anonymous3! I'll be honest. I had written a piece here about playing "hookey", but added a "c" by mistake, so the webmaster there made an honest mistake in inviting me to join that group...

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4) Dear That Dan Guy,
Charlie Chicken kills me. However, aren't chickens female?? Shouldn't Charlie be a rooster??

A: Well, Anonymous 4, thanks for writing in about that foul fowl from the weekend postings. I'd have to say that either Charlie is completely delusional, or my knowledge of farm animals is admittedly lacking. All I can say for sure is that he's a real pain in the a......

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5) Dear Bozo Boy,
You should quit posting so much crap here yourself, and let Charlie take over. He's the best!!

A: OK, so uh, is there a question there??

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6) Is Charlie available now??

A: NO! Can we get back to MY blog for a minute??

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Well, that seems to be a good spot to stop for today. Enjoy what's left of your weekend, everybody!!

Chow for now!!