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Monday, November 14, 2011


I would just like to announce that there will be no blog post today. Occasionally, these mornings arise where try as I may, try as I might - there is nothing. Zip. Zero. The cranium is vacant.

Most days that happens, I try and cover up with some silly bit about how I “have nothing”. Today will not be one of those days. I respect my reader(s) too much to try and pass off a sow’s ear as a silk purse. Sure, you could say that pretty much every day here is a sow’s ear to some degree, but hey, you’re the one reading this stuff!

No, I am completely at peace with knowing that I am going to sacrifice consistency for substance. Some stands are just worth taking, like when a guy pees. Especially if he’s been driving for a really long time, and he finally finds a rest room that looks like it might not be harbouring serial killers finding their victims along major highway systems.

I think it’s actually my sacred duty to hold back from an obvious “phoning it in” post, when I don’t really have a valid topic to expand upon, and share. Although, it would be really cool if I could phone it in, as my two-finger typing style has resulted in two really buff index fingers, beside eight other fat, atrophied hand digits. Kind of like how Popeye has really big biceps, but a body that otherwise defies the science of muscular development. It’s like Sylvester Stallone’s arms on Shia Labeouf. Whose last name is technically “The Beef” in French, by the way - which is kinda funny, considering his scrawny physique. Ou est Labeouf? Pas de beouf, Shia....

But, I ramble. Let’s just say here that I am truly sorry. I have nothing, and that’s what you’re getting here today. A blank cheque. A barren page. Tumbleweeds of the word processor.

Suck it up, buttercup.

Chow for now!!


Mrs That Dan Guy said...

Well, for someone who had nothing, after reading that my head is spinning! I went from "what?!" "Serial killers in rest rooms along the highway" to "what?!" "Buff index fingers?" to "What the hell?!" "Labeouf?!" OMG! I think your cranium is not empty, it is broken! YOU suck it up buttercup! Ugh, I am exhausted now, thanks. Thanks a lot!

ThatDanGuy said...