I’ve got to be very, very quiet. Mrs. That Dan Guy is getting ready, and I’m trying to have a healthy breakfast (Bran Flakes, covered in Bran Seeds, with just a smattering of 100% skimmed milk). She thinks I only eat unhealthy food products for breakfast, which is part of the fun.

Historically, even since my toddler years, I have started my mornings with two pieces of toast, day after day after day. Two pieces of toast, with peanut butter, and either honey or jam. One morning, after DECADES of this relentless breakfast offering, I began to get bored. I needed something new.

So, I started to make it appear to MTDG that I was eating terribly unhealthy things, while all the while I was REALLY eating things like fresh apple slices, and Bran by the bowlful. There’s a potentially crude comment I could tie in with that last statement, but just in case you haven’t had YOUR own breakfast yet, I will behave myself and not expand that train of thought… You’re welcome.

So, while I have truthfully been eating twigs and berries every morning, I’ve had to parade a parade of horribly unhealthy products, to get the crazy lady off the trail. I’ve pretended to eat Fruit Loops, Frosted Flakes, Chocolate Chip Eggo’s with strawberry syrup, and butter sticks. I’ve put forth the illusion that I’ve been eating sautéed bacon and deep-fried sausage links. I once tried to create the illusion that I was dining on homemade Egg McMuffins, covered in peanut butter and honey. That one actually sounds pretty good..

Is there any particular reason for this behaviour? When it comes to the way MY mind works, there really isn’t a proper answer for that question. All I can say is that I am compelled to action, and then the chips (chocolate) will just have to fall where they may.

Chow for now!!