We went to see some harness racing yesterday, for the first time ever. It’s like horseracing, but with the riders on a little buggy behind the horse, instead of riding on top, like they do with thoroughbred racing…

Which ended up as some relief. We had originally wondered if they just tossed old harnesses off the roof of a building, to see which one might land first. Horses just added to the excitement!!

Now, as I’m still cautiously guarding my 2-week old PETA apprenticeship membership, I should qualify that they don’t throw the horses off a building. The animals and their rear-end jockeys race around a track.

And as I don’t want to offend any other readers, what I mean to say by “rear-end” drivers is that the jockeys sit in one of those aforementioned buggies, behind the horse. Sheesh…so little time, so many to offend.

Oh well, at least I’m not Mel Gibson…that guy knows how to offend people!

Anyways, the point of this whole exchange (now that I’ve apologized and clarified to everyone well in advance) is that harness racing is quite a bit of fun. We stayed for 7 of the 11 races, and managed to bet successfully on a couple of winners. Thankfully for the track owners, we were less successful on many other wagers.

My wife (as usual) picked the most winners. My horses frequently led the field right out of the gate, but sort of settled into a nice safe place near the very back of the pack by the time the finish line appeared. Sort of a gradual transition from Sea Biscuit to Stale Biscuit…

Speaking of biscuits, we left our suite a little bit behind schedule, and had to grab lunch at the racetrack. As is typically the case with racetracks, arenas, and football stadiums, you are allowed the privilege of eating cold wieners in colder buns, French fries that are one large solid blob, and popcorn that has actually passed an expiry date. Makes you reflect on why you never see any of the racehorses in the concession lineup…

One of the fun aspects of picking horses at the track is going by some of the wacky names that the owners come up with. Here’s just a few we had to choose from:

-Vanishing Equity
-Left At Sale
-Pan Roll On
-Whoop As
-Widdle Diddle

Very punny…

Chow for now!!