I’ve taken to viewing my wife’s arrival to our hotel, then greeting her on the intercom with various outburts, as she enters the building (we have a monitor in the entry that you can view on our TV screen, hence alerting me to her pending arrival).

The first time, I said something like “Welcome to Temp-Abode. For service in English, please press 1”. The camera picked up a substantial amount of embarrassment on her face, as well as amusement. Nobody else was in the vestibule at the time.

The second time, I hollered something like “Preparing to beam aboard, Captain”, in a Scottish accent. Another fellow coming home for lunch almost caught my Star Trek reference, and my wife entered a little more hastily than the last time…

By the third time, I started crooning. Referring to The Elevator/Waiting Area Manual, I started with that old 70’s background hit - Feelings, by Morris Albert. No longer showing consistent signs of amusement, I had to rack my brains to offer even better greetings whenever I saw her tug open the outside door…

I’d like to say I thought of something even more brilliant after all that, but for the next two days I suspect she began to wait outside until other people arrived, and she would come in along with them. One time I buzzed her in, and the puzzled guy in front of her wondered how the door automatically opened – some security feature that is, he said. She just smiled and suggested that the front desk was buzzing the door open for delivery people, even those dressed in a suit and tie.

Yesterday, I did a Supremes hit, followed up with an Elvis “thank you, thank you very much”. She laughed in spite of herself, and when she approached the elevator, the lady at the front desk was laughing as well.

Do you suppose that they monitor the entry system??

Chow for now!!