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Sunday, March 02, 2008


Cooking With Dan Lesson #11

Appled Chicken

Greetings, dear readers. Today I’m putting on my Rachael Ray hat, and sharing some tips on preparing Appled Chicken, a cherished Such Is Life household recipe.

First, you will need the ingredients:

1) A chicken – preferably fresh and clean, but if you’ve got a pesky one around your house that keeps drinking your beer without permission, grab the little clucker by the scruff of his neck, and pluck his caboose clean…

2) An apple – I’ve always tried to use apples fresh from the vine, or at least something that professes to be organic. Failing those simple criteria, a lowly crate apple from a supermarket display should do the trick just as well…

3) A large platter, to contain the poached poultry, and gleaming apple.

4) Balsamic vinegar. It’s the only thing that seems to clean the gravel out from between the claws of the average free range cackler…

5) Beer. To stuff the bird. So as to have him woozy enough not to notice the preparations for dinner, to which he is invited, but will not be seated, so to speak…

6) An oven. I always assume this goes without saying when cooking is involved, but some people need pictures drawn…

OK, you’ve got your ingredients, and your chicken is sufficiently snockered. If his singing and swaying is bothersome, simply club the bird once with a can of frozen peas. The peas may come in handy, after he’s out of the oven.

Once the bird is immobilized, pop it into a pre-heated oven (425°), for about 35 minutes. Ensuring that he is a golden brown (or grey – some birds just don’t bronze), remove him from the oven, and place him on a platter. Give the apple one last polish, and firmly implant it in the beak. Serve with fresh greens, or thawed peas. Serves 4.

Enjoy! Salut!! Bon Appetit!!!

Chow for now…

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